I'm a Free Agent

I hereby declare that I am a free agent. In sports this term refers to an athlete who's contract has expired with a team and is available for negotiations with other teams. I have no contract to expire, but I want to take a different approach in my employment negotiations. Typically I've approached employers with the attitude that I'm powerless and my only option is to take what they are willing to give--but I think I can do better. I graduated magna cum laude with my BA. I have two masters degrees and some post graduate study. I have a strong work ethic. I'm dependable, teachable, and a quick learner. I think I'm worth more than barely above minimum wage, and at the mercy of my employer for the few hours I can get! So if there is anyone reading this out there who is looking to hire and think they can make me an offer good enough that I can put food on my table, please message me. I'll make it worth your while if you make it worth mine.